Christmas really isn’t about getting an Xbox 360, Iphone, new cell phone plan or extra goodies. Sometimes we lose sight of the inner spirit of the holidays and measure things by the gifts that we receive. This is especially frustrating to parents to see the focus of their kids on the latest gadgets.
Use this time of year to look at photo albums, do some community service and visit a grandparent or relative that may live in a nursing home or have aging issues. This helps kids increase their sensitivity and not just focus on “things”. One of my clients who is 17 and was focusing primarily on her nails and hair had a big turn around last year when she went with her mom for a running event to support breast cancer. She felt like she was doing something beyond herself and this gave her new perspective. It enabled her to think of other people in harder circumstances and stopped her from thinking her appearance was the sole focus in life.
It is more of a teaching tool to have a teen or child get their own revelation than to give a lecture on selfishness or caring for other people. What registers is when you actually experience the joy of giving and appreciate your circumstance. Think about ways to introduce this into your kids’ lives.
This doesn’t mean you should ignore gift giving, but to also be sure to add in a way that kindness, generosity and care can be displayed in non-material ways. Even if your kids have a negative attitude and seem only self-centered, they will warm up to seeing a smile on someone’s face when they do something for someone. You may have to be creative in coming up with ways to teach these lessons, but keep them in mind for the holidays.